Just came home from a big day out, don't want to do work.

"Rightfully so."

Ok, sorry Jasmine, Mark, JM. I'm not going to do anything that I said I would until I've played some games. Though, I will get around to doing what I said I would, later tonight.

Sorry.

Nevermind that. Here's my thoughts on working hard:

1. If you don't work hard, you're not likely to get anything on your own.

2. If you don't work hard, you might complain, but you have no right to.

3. If you don't work hard, you're going to be looked down upon, and scorned.

4. Working hard is desiring stuff, yes, but what are you going to do about it?

5. If you don't want to be a failure who didn't do anything but move their mouth, then go ahead. Don't work hard. Let others cover for you.

6. There is not enough ample incentive to work hard, is there? No consequences for failing to work either; consequently, people will always be there to cover for you, whether you work hard or not.

7. All that bullcrap about having a good lifestyle because of your money is quite true.

To recap, because my laziness forbids me to write anymore (sorry):

"It is often said that to make a profit is a not a good thing, but that is only what humans that lack virtue say out of envy.

They think that not working is good, but that is not the case.

Money works in such a way that earning and spending become good deeds in themselves."

Just don't become a merchant. Else, we'll have to stone you, and spit on you because you're not making your own crafts; you're relying on the works of others.

Hoping you understand.

It's only when you've lost everything...

"Rely on your own strength".

Nothing really much going on today. Maths, maths, maths

Just a somewhat big stack of maths, and it's approaching the second week of the holidays. But I'm not too stressed. Not about my subjects.

Except English. Oh well.

And then some talking about motivation and willingness to improve and complacency and whether losing really is fun, or whether losing gives you the determination to strive to be better.

Maybe, maybe not.

AFAIK, I'm nearly...well.

I have some Bio questions set by teach. Which numbers in the 30s or so.

And then math work, plus revision from my book.

What else...Physics stuff.

That's it for all the stuff I MUST DO THIS HOLIDAYS.

Extra work is textbook reading/doing. And reading materials for English. I suppose.....hmm. And I have another essay question, but I don't feel like it atm.

Holidays is making me weak, I think. Or maybe I'm just tired.

Hoping it's just the latter? Maybe.

I think they were right.

"Make an ipod app!" - A.R.

Y'now, I woke up today, and my father is actually going to do just that. It's rather...interesting, I suppose.

Also, I just realised that I do tend to see the darker side of things. Which is rather amusing, I'll admit.

Like, if someone doesn't hear me, first instinct is that they're ignoring me, and might hate me.

Then, perspective comes in, kicks the latter away, and still I'm left with they're ignoring me.

It's all rather amusing, because then I realise that I'm just being silly and they just didn't hear me.

Although, that's just one part.

Maybe I have changed. Hrm...

Whether it's for the better, who knows.

Also, do you ever wonder what would happen if the people you knew met you in/on different/differing circumstances? I do. Quite a bit.

Like how I imagine that had I met this one person on differing circumstances, it might have saved me quite a bit of heartache, or maybe, it would have just been that we would actually end up as friends.

I really don't know, but it's damn interesting.

Lastly, looking at the stars. I used to not like it. But, I love the night, and I looked up today while I was waiting for someone, and it just dawned on me (haha.) that I should look up more.

Figuratively speaking...well. It just means that I'm always looking at the ground, forward, doesn't it?

If I don't make sense, then sobeit. But I'm sure I make sense to someone.

Oh, oh. I'm steadily getting demotivated to play games. Serious. Melee = No-one interesting to play, and also melee comp got taken over by father. SC = I need to learn soooooooooooo much. Like, how to Proxy BBS right, for starters. I figure, that the fastest way to get to C is through Proxy BBS. So, micro training it is? Hm.

So, switching back to learning SC again? I really don't know.

Hoping someone understands. Maybe not. Or maybe I'll just keep up the really vague and mysterious look. Idk.

I should be studying...

"What do you mean, overly negative outlook on life?"

Ok, what's scary?

The fact that it's taken a few years of people to call me what 2 people on a casual forum took 10 minutes to call me.

Either they're really good, and you're really bad, or that they're generally more honest. I don't know which one.

Mainly that I'm too realistic and unimaginative.

Oh well. Live, learn, deal with it.

Also...

I have a lot to study, but I'm getting through it fairly quickly. Sort of. It's getting there. Once I finish all my sheet and whatnot, I'll just have to find more work.

There was something else I was going to say. Hm......

Something rather uncanny. And about this morning's events.

It'll come to me eventually.

Hoping it does.

Feel free to punch me if...

"Hum..."

Ok.

You can (try to) punch me on certain conditions:
1. If I ever play DoTA before HSC
2. If I'm being far too silly for anyone to understand
3. If you feel like it

Heh.

Also, making a new formula type thing. Mornings ====> Afternoon is only:

1. Reading
2. Writing
3. General Study
4. Cooking

Cooking is such fun sometimes. It's really nice to have a heat there to warm yourself with, I suppose.

Also, I really feel like writing a story, so perhaps I'll do just that.

There's a fine line between happiness and sadness, I find.

And, theory about sadness...hm. Perhaps, if you're really interested, then ask me sometime. And I'll debate whether I should tell you or not.

Also, not that I should be telling you this, but hm...

Well, I'll think about it.

(It was a "don't get me X for my birthday, if you are even thinking about getting me something, at all")

Hoping no-one thinks I'm joking. (I am being serious. Try punching me.)

How...depressing.

"Well. Posting?"

http://malechauvinist.blogspot.com/

It's really really depressing. Maybe just to me.

Ok, how did I get onto that site?

Was doing a vocab quiz, and one of the words was "Misogynist".

Why is it depressing? For one, the author is female.

For another, they argue a whole lot better than I do.

Thirdly, it's just really depressing. And yet, interesting.

Because it's all about reality. Or, well. What we think of reality.

Though unfortunately, I can't use that site for my Eng Ext stuff, because it would take far too much explanation. Albeit, the points are good. Hm.

http://malechauvinist.blogspot.com/2008/03/feminine-morality-vs-masculine-morality.html

Like, take a gander at that one. Honestly.

"Free speech is sacred, but laws prohibiting speech we don't like are necessary and in no way confine freedom of speech"

Which in a way, is pretty true of today. Assange anyone?

"Free speech is sacred, even if it means hearing things we don't like"

In a way, that blondie is similar to Voltaire. All he needs is a fullblown wig.

"children are routinely punished for defending themselves when other children beat up on them, while the children who initiate the violence are never punished."

Indeed, full of goodies. Yea, you'll probably pass some weird judgment about me. But I don't care. The world is there so that we can learn, to be better people, to help others, etc. etc.

You can't even begin to do that with your eyes closed. Or deaf. So, this is the same.

I suppose, as gruesome as it is, Draconian Law and capital punishment is a pretty good way of making people behave like the nice people of a perfect utopian society should, right?

Too twisted? Sorry.

Maybe it's just one of those twist and turn things where, being from a relatively sheltered background, I don't have such sadness. In fact, I haven't had the same grief and experiences as anyone else, so I suppose learning is the only way to understand.

http://malechauvinist.blogspot.com/2008/03/how-men-and-women-argue.html

Sometimes, I get the feeling that adults really understand what I mean and feel when peers don't. And it's kinda of comforting, but weird.

Ah. I knew it. It really is depressing.

Mutter...

Nevermind me? Hm. I want to have this as a type of journal post to show what I've been doing in the holidays. Well, obviously thinking hard.

They'd be proud.

And I really do have a theory about sad backgrounds. Really. I'll tell you someday about it. It's really really really weird. Or uncanny. Whichever one.

"As if we needed another reason to keep women out of politics. "

That one's a little mean, but maybe she's justified.

Oh. ho..

Sociology? Yea, I'm learning more about it.

Psychology? Sort of.

Hence, theoretically better essays for adv. In theory. Of course, in practice, I still need to express myself clearly.

Anyway, I'll leave you to it.

So complex..

It's complicated.

http://www.backlash.com/content/gender/1996/4-apr96/wilson04.html

Exactly what I meant. Never in my life, had any connections with ANY male who has suicided. Numbers don't lie, therefore, my life is just a small scope, isn't it?

Ehe...Just reminded of this:

"The world ends with you. If you want to enjoy life, expand your world. You gotta push your horizons out as far as they'll go." - Hanekoma Sanae

Hoping you have a look.